Read: Matthew 18:3

Jesus said, "I tell you the truth, you must change and become like little children. Otherwise, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven."

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Discuss

• What does it mean when Jesus says that we need to become like little children? In what ways?

• The Apostle Paul uses the metaphor, "the body of Christ," over and over again in his writings: what is the power of this metaphor and what could it mean for our relationships?

• PC said if we are growing and are healthy, our "circles of love" will be expanding; our openness to love - both receiving love and extending it - will be increasing. 
  • What does your "circle of love" look like?

• What kinds of things cause us to close ourselves off?

Isolation breads brokenness, and brokenness breads isolation.

We have to choose to end the cycle by engaging life and choosing openness and love.

• What are some small ways in which we can begin to choose openness and love?

Read: John 10:10

I came to give life—life in all its fullness.

• What is true and abundant life? 

• How can this be found through openness?

READ: PROVERBS 18:17-21

The person who tells one side of a story seems right,
    until someone else comes and asks questions. 

Throwing lots can settle arguments
    and keep the two sides from fighting.

A brother who has been insulted is harder to win back than a walled city,
    and arguments separate people like the barred gates of a palace.

People will be rewarded for what they say;
    they will be rewarded by how they speak.

What you say can mean life or death.
    Those who speak with care will be rewarded.

READ: JAMES 3:2-5

We all make many mistakes. If people never said anything wrong, they would be perfect and able to control their entire selves, too. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can control their whole bodies. Also a ship is very big, and it is pushed by strong winds. But a very small rudder controls that big ship, making it go wherever the pilot wants. It is the same with the tongue. It is a small part of the body, but it brags about great things.

Q: PC said that people are the greatest treasures in our lives, how are our words related to our relationships with others?

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DISCUSS

• Have you ever been in a conversation where you know someone is holding back?
  • What does that do to the conversation/relationship?

• How can our unspoken expectations of others have a negative impact on our relationships?

• Paul says, in Colossians 4, that our conversation should be gracious and attractive - which he likens to seasoning your food with salt. 
  • What are some intentional ways you can communicate better with those around you?

It is not necessarily about correcting your words, it's a heart thing!

READ: LUKE 6:43-45

“A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. A tree is identified by its fruit. Figs are never gathered from thornbushes, and grapes are not picked from bramble bushes. A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart."

• Philippians 4 say, "Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable." PC says that doing this will help "fill our tanks."
  • What sources/people/places are you using to fill your tank?

The "honesty" of communication is saying hat needs to be said,

but saying it in love with self-awareness and humility.

READ: GENESIS 3:6-10

The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves.

When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard theLord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. Then the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?”

He replied, “I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked."

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Fear plays on our insecurities, causing us to react irrationally and, often, creates a "Self-FULFILLED prophecy" as our actions can actually bring our fears to life. Our imaginations soon start to run and has the potential to put us in a dark place. However, we have the power to trust and give up our control to God.

DISCUSS:

• What is the silliest thing you have "put on a front" about?

• "Keeping up with the Jones's" is exhausting; What was the mental and emotional outcome from doing this?  

• In the garden Adam and Eve felt the weight of putting on a mask and covering themselves up from God. Have you ever felt this weight?

READ: 1 SAMUEL 18:6-10

When the victorious Israelite army was returning home after David had killed the Philistine, women from all the towns of Israel came out to meet King Saul. They sang and danced for joy with tambourines and cymbals.This was their song:

“Saul has killed his thousands,
    and David his ten thousands!”

This made Saul very angry. “What’s this?” he said. “They credit David with ten thousands and me with only thousands. Next they’ll be making him their king!”So from that time on Saul kept a jealous eye on David.

The very next day a tormenting spirit from God overwhelmed Saul, and he began to rave in his house like a madman.

DISCUSS:

• What fears do you have that stem from lack of familiarity?
  • In other words, is there something your'e afraid of based on a very limited understanding of that thing? 

• Anger and fear are often intertwined, and can result in shifting blame.
  • Don't answer here, but is there something you're blaming on another that is really the result of your anger, insecurity and fear? 

READ: 1 JOHN 4:18

"Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love."

DISCUSS:

• Jesus came to give us a different operating system. Instead of our automatic default being fear, how do we combat it in a positive way?

• Have you ever overcame a fear and realized it wasn't what you thought it was?

Loving ourselves AND OTHERS the way that God made us

has the ability to change the world.

• Going into this coming week, how can you celebrate who YOU are as well as the people around you? 

READ: Ecclesiastes 3: 1-3

"For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.

• What season do you find yourself in?
  • Do you find yourself resisting change and challenge rather than welcoming it? 

There is a time and season for everything. Sometimes we find it hard

in life to actually accept our seasons rather than adapting to them.

We also find out that life keeps moving.

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DISCUSS

Wisdom is said to be the "gift that keeps on giving", yet we live in a culture that values knowledge over having wisdom. Wisdom is knowing what to do with all of the knowledge we have. 

• What is the best advice you have ever received? and why?

• Is there someone in your life that speaks wisdom to you?
  • Are you speaking wisdom into someone's life?

READ: James 3:17-18

But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.

• Later in James's letter it says, "it is a sin if you know what you should do and don't do it." 
  • How can knowledge and wisdom be at odds with each other?

READ: Proverbs 3:13-14

Joyful is the person who finds wisdom,
    the one who gains understanding.
For wisdom is more profitable than silver,
    and her wages are better than gold.
Wisdom is more precious than rubies;
    nothing you desire can compare with her.
She offers you long life in her right hand,
    and riches and honor in her left.
She will guide you down delightful paths;
    all her ways are satisfying.
Wisdom is a tree of life to those who embrace her;
    happy are those who hold her tightly.

• How can wisdom bring life?

The key to THRIVING in every season under the sun is having wisdom.

READ: Matthew 5:38-48

“You have heard the law that says the punishment must match the injury: ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say, do not resist an evil person! If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also. If you are sued in court and your shirt is taken from you, give your coat, too. If a soldier demands that you carry his gear for a mile, carry it two miles. Give to those who ask, and don’t turn away from those who want to borrow.

“You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect."

• How were you taught to deal with, or handle conflict?

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DISCUSS:

• Do Jesus's teachings on interaction with others seem like unachievable ideals that aren't even worth attempting?

• Have you ever responded to violence, insult or humiliation with violence, insult or humiliation?
  • If yes, what was the outcome?

OVERCOMING HURT DOES NOT MEAN RETALIATION OR "GETTING EVEN," IT REQUIRES THE CREATIVITY TO CALL OUT YOUR OPPRESSOR'S HUMANITY BY REVEALING YOUR OWN

READ: Philippians 3:12-14

I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

• Can you look back at some past responses and see yourself responding better now?

• Have you ever been in a situation where you had to "elevate" your response?

OUR RESPONSES ARE A MEASURE OF OUR GROWTH

• How can we see conflict as a way to get to the deeper levels of our humanity?

• Are there creative ways to overcome conflict by being proactive rather than reactive?

READ: Ephesian 3:16-19

I pray that from God's glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

• What does the word "love" mean to you?

• Have your conceptions of love changed over time? How?

• How does love make us "complete"?

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READ: 1 John 4:7-12

Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love. God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins. Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us.

• What does it mean that "love comes from God"?
  • Does this mean that every act of love is "God within us"?

• What does it mean to love others like this?

READ: Romans 8:35, 37-39

Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

• What does this passage mean to you, that there is nothing that can separate us from God's love